Famous Last Words

In our culture famous last words signify a prediction of some sort in which the exact opposite is what usually happens. Not to be confused with actual last words which are just that -- last words. Like the one in which a bunch of friends were cruising around a big lake in a pontoon boat enjoying the day and wiping out scores of brain cells with multiple pitchers of martinis. When this one inebriated chap says "it doesn't get any better than this". His exact words were something like "hit doesssssent fit heny bearrrer un dissss". Following which he topples over the starboard midsection and drowns. So much for the idea that alcohol is lighter than water, cause this dude sunk like a rock. Perhaps dead brain cells have a higher density than live ones.

In contrast to actual last words, famous last words aren't normally associated with death. Bad days, yes, but not ones that bad. Here are a few that I have experienced, or thought of:

• It shouldn't cost you more than about $100 to fix your car.
• Mother is only going to stay a couple of days.
• Let's knock off this roof job for today and finish tomorrow. It won't rain between now and then.
• We don't need expensive topo maps to keep from getting lost, we've got a compass.
• It's just over the next hill.
• We should be able to get across Texas by tonight; its only one state.
• We don't need a bailing bucket. You can't punch a hole in a tough boat like this.
• We can skinny dip here. There won't be anybody coming along.
• He's a very gentle horse. You won't get bucked off riding him.
• Go ahead and pick his hooves. That mule won't kick.

That's as many as I can think of off the top of my head. As I come across more I'll add them later. But for now, this is enough.